This is written for men who feminise because they love women and femininity, and who want to pass as authentically female. NOT for kink, or for those who do it only as a form of humiliation, or because they believe âto be a slut I must dress like a woman.â What follows is for those who want to learn how to embody the feminine in a way that feels authentic, respectful, and alive.
This is a quick, focused introduction:
I have spent years feminising men â not only in dungeons, but professionally, for stage and performance. One thing Iâve learned is that most men think feminisation is about how they look. That is, they treat it as costume. They focus on body parts â breasts, hips, lips â because thatâs how they have always been trained to see women. As objects reduced to âbits.â
This, however, is the male version of feminisation. It reproduces the same objectification men impose on women, only now upon themselves. Drag queens and trans performers alike often exaggerate the bodyâs sexual markers through a male gaze: bubble breasts, sculpted curves, and hyper-stylised movements. These can be fun, theatrical, and powerful in their own right. But they are not the same as authentic feminisation. They reveal that, underneath, their psychology remains masculine.
Real feminisation goes deeper. Living in a female body is not just about appearance, itâs about mindset. Itâs how you think about yourself, how you move, how you experience your body from the inside out. When men only focus on the surface, they miss the essence of femininity.
Take breasts as an example. Many men want oversized âbubble titsâ because they think thatâs what makes someone look female. But in reality, breasts that are too large for your frame instantly give away the disguise â they look performative, not authentic. A slender frame with an A or B cup looks far more natural than a flat chest suddenly sprouting DDs. Real women know this. They know that posture and proportion matter more than size.
Posture is everything, no matter the size of your breasts. A common mistake I see in men is forcing the chest forward by arching the back and pinching the shoulders. This creates a stiff, awkward tension that looks unnatural and, worse, can damage the spine. Women donât present their breasts this way. True elegance comes from the centre â from the diaphragm. When a woman lifts her chest, it rises as a natural extension of her carriage. Thatâs what creates elegance.
What most men donât realise is that women with large breasts donât need to push them outward to be seen. They already draw attention. Instead, the focus is on balance. Bras, for example, are not about holding breasts in, but lifting them up â shaping the torso so that the curve of waist and bust contrast each other. So… Authentic feminisation isnât about exaggeration; itâs about body balance. Women think of their body as a wholeâ how the waistline frames the bust and hips, and how posture creates flow. To feminise with authenticity, itâs not enough to emphasise breasts alone; itâs about balancing the body, shaping posture, and carrying yourself as a whole.
Things like frame, height and age matter. At fifty-one, I know my breasts should not sit as high as they did at eighteen. If I forced them into that position, I would look like a drag queen, not a woman. Real breasts fall with weight, gravity, and time. To feminise authentically means to respect that physical truth, not to parody it. When men raise their tits too high for their age, shape, or frame, they reveal that their âfeminisationâ is not about valuing femininity, but about fetishising female bits. Women see this instantly, and many feel mocked by it.
The irony is that women often hide their breasts. We angle them away from unwanted attention. We minimise, not exaggerate. And it is precisely this discretion makes women more alluring, more attractive, and more powerful. Seduction lives not in the push to be seen, but in the restraint of exposure. True femininity knows that mystery is its own power. Men who thrust their âbitsâ forward in feminisation might demonstrate that their shell is feminine, but their psychology remains masculine. It is men who assert their body, women embrace with theirs… the energies are opposite directions, and mindset too. There is always a paradox, isn’t there?
Essentially, I teach my men to think like a woman. To live their bodies as women live them. Their shift is profound, and changes their relationship to their body when feminised. I want them to realise that authentic feminisation is not about putting tits and hips on display, but about creating flow, balance, and elegance. Women think of themselves as whole â from head to toe. Men, when they feminise, don’t, they just feel the parts that have been added to them. A woman doesnât reduce herself to parts. She considers her neck, her wrists, her ankles, her waist and how they all complement each other.
So when a man feminises authentically, when he learns to move and think like a woman, his whole energy changes. He no longer looks like a parody or mockery, and more importantly for him, he no longer feels like that either. His femininity feels real, lived, and respectful. And women can tell. To feminise authentically is to enter the female aesthetic of being: whole, subtle, intelligent, and lived. Femininity is not just a costume, it is a way of thinking, feeling, and moving.
So… here are some tips for you:
A Quick Guide to Feminisation Beyond the Surface
Step 1: Understand the Difference Between Male and Female Perspectives
Most men see women as body parts: breasts, lips, hips, ass. Thatâs why when men feminise themselves, they exaggerate those same parts. But women donât live as a collection of parts â they live as whole beings. Authentic feminisation starts with shifting your mindset: from objectification to embodiment.
Donât ask, âHow can I look more like a woman?â Ask, âHow can I think, move, and feel like one?â
Step 2: Proportion Matters More Than Size
The quickest giveaway of male-centric feminisation is breast size. A slender frame suddenly sprouting oversized DDs looks like parody. Authentic femininity respects proportion. Many women naturally fit best into an A or B cup.
Choose shapes and sizes that fit your natural frame. If your goal is to pass or to embody, proportion is your ally; excess is your enemy.
Step 3: Learn Feminine Posture the Right Way
A common mistake is arching the back and pushing the chest out. This creates an awkward tension that looks fake and harms your spine. Women donât do this (unless they are young and they don’t know better). Women lift from the diaphragm, which naturally lengthens the spine, raises the chest, and creates graceful carriage.
Practice rising from your breath, not your back. Stand tall, soften your shoulders, and let your chest lift effortlessly. That is feminine elegance.
Step 4: Think Like a Woman Living in Her Body
Women with large breasts donât focus on flaunting them â they focus on managing them. Bras are about keeping breasts lifted and supported, not just presented. Feminisation isnât about showing off; itâs about thinking and moving like someone who lives inside a female body every day.
Shift your focus from âshowâ to âsupport.â Authenticity comes from function first, then form.
Step 5: Whole-Body Awareness
Real femininity is head-to-toe. A woman considers her wrists, her neck, her waist, her ankles â the harmony of the whole. Men often ignore these subtler details.
When you feminise, donât just think, âDo my tits look good?â Think, âHow does my whole body look?â Necklines, waistlines, and ankles often speak louder than breasts and hips.
Step 6: Seduction Is in Subtlety
Women know that being discreet can be more powerful than being overt – a hint, a glance. When men shove everything forward for attention, it often comes across as desperation, not allure.
Feminisation that respects mystery is more seductive than feminisation that screams for attention.
Step 7: Feminisation Is Psychological
This is the hardest lesson. You can paint your face, pad your hips, and wear heels, but if youâre still thinking like a man, it will show. Feminisation becomes authentic when you adopt a feminine mindset: caring for your body as a whole, valuing proportion, moving with awareness, and embodying elegance over exaggeration.
Donât just dress like a woman â think like one. Let the psychology shape your body, not the other way around.
So…
When I feminise my men â whether privately or for the stage â I donât just change their look. I change how they think about their body. And once their mind shifts, their body follows. Thatâs when feminisation stops being caricature and starts being art.